The following exercise is one of the most enjoyable aspects of developing leadership; it gives you instant rewards and sets the direction for your new goals.
Plan a meeting for a day when everyone who works for you can attend. Have a nice lunch brought in and do a few extra things to make it special. This is not a meeting to convey negative news or anything remotely uncomfortable.
Open the meeting by announcing your plan to become a better manager, to learn more about them and to build a stronger team. Declare your desire to accept all input, both positive and negative.
Plan a couple of team-building exercises that will foster relationships among team members. One method is to pair them off and instruct one person to interview the other. Select three things in advance—such as favorite movie, secret passion, most admired person, etc.— that each interviewer should learn about his partner. After the first group is finished, ask everyone to switch roles. When all the team members have been interviewed, ask each person to stand and give a three-minute talk on the co-worker he or she interviewed. The idea is to get them talking to one another. Another fun game is to ask everyone to bring a baby picture, post the photos on a board and have a “Guess Who This Is” activity. That is always a fun team builder.
The Essential Moment of Truth
In order to improve as a leader, it’s essential to solicit feedback from your reports. This requires bravery and nerves of steel. At some point in your team meeting, pull a flip chart to the center of the room and select a leader for this exercise. Announce to the group that you are going to leave the room so they can talk about you. Ask them to make a list of things on the flip chart that you could do better. Tell them that this is their chance to vent and speak honestly. Encourage them not to seek approval by writing complimentary things. Also, remind them not to list things that are out of your control but to focus on things that you can change.
After about forty-five minutes, return to the meeting and spend time going over the results. Resist the urge to be defensive. It is such a natural reaction, especially if something that you do has been misunderstood. You will have plenty of time to work this out later.
At the end of the meeting, open your appointment book and schedule one-on-one meetings—over lunch, if possible—with every direct report. During each meeting, plan to complete the get-to-know-you exercise and raise a couple of points brought up when you were out of the room.
When making one-on-one field or office visits, use a notebook to record everything you can about each person—from birthday to favorite sports to music—after his or her respective meeting. Make a page for each employee and keep it updated. They will be amazed that you are keeping track of things and showing a personal interest.
This notebook need not be kept a secret if it makes you uncomfortable to do so, and it should never contain anything illegal or private. It is a journal for you to remember the important things in a conversation and to guarantee follow-up. I have always preferred to keep my notes private; it is your choice.
When you know your direct reports well enough to answer the questions listed earlier, you are truly on your way to becoming a leader.
Author's note: An 20-year veteran of the securities industry, advisor coach Patti Branco is a securities industry consultant, and founder of Patti Branco Management Solutions. And can be reached at 903-451-9800. 
